These “mixed feelings” of yours.
If you have no reason to feel the way you do, and yet you do, it doesn’t necessarily mean that there is no reason (you are irrational), or that you’re wrong to feel that way (you are mistaken), or that you should feel otherwise (you are dissolute).
But it might. It’s worth investigating.
As is the relationship between reason and feeling and you. You could think in terms of equi’vocation and ambi’valence.